And we're back, with another epic from our friends at Cannon. 1987 was really the last good year for them, as financial difficulties and feuding between studio heads Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus would lead to the decline and eventual disappearance of the studio. But the real reason I call 1987 the last good year for the company is because American Ninja 2: The Confrontation was released that year. You'll find out why when I get to that one, but for now, let's talk about our feature presentation.

This time out, it's the fourth film in the Death Wish series, where we once again learn why you should never be related to, a friend of, or even associate with a Charles Bronson character, because you will not be long for this world. Oh sure, you could say the lesson is really don't screw with Charles Bronson, but watching the films, I'm more inclined to go with my theory.

A brief primer on the series:

Death Wish (1974): Paul Kersey is a New York family man who's driven to take the law into his own hands after his wife and daughter are attacked.

Death Wish II (1982): Pretty much the same thing, only this time he's in Los Angeles and it's just his daughter who's killed (the wife dies in the first film). It's pretty repulsive and rough viewing.

Death Wish 3 (1985): Kersey heads back to the Big Apple, and moves into the worst neighborhood in movie history. Even though he's run out of family members, he still has plenty of friends who can be horribly killed. This time, things go into comic book territory as Kersey becomes a one-man army and wipes out an entire gang of thugs.

This brings us to 1987's Death Wish 4: The Crackdown. Paul Kersey is back, and is as far from the tortured liberal from the first film as you can possibly get. This time out, he's in a Fistful of Dollars-type scenario, pitting rival drug dealers against each other after his girlfriend's daughter dies of an overdose.

Replacing director Michael Winner after three films is J. Lee Thompson, who's a long, long way from The Guns of Navarone and Cape Fear. About the best thing to be said about this movie is that it's better than Firewalker, which he did the year before.

It's the bog standard plot here: we open with Paul Kersey spending time with people he cares about. Something bad happens, and then our steely hero is out for vengeance once again. There are some inventive moments here, and it's miles better than the repulsive second film (though, not as hilariously bad as the third). On the whole, it's a cheesy, reasonably fun ride, but when all is said and done, it's still pretty dire filmmaking.

I give it 6 out of 10 steely grimaces. Let's check it out.

Highlights:

1. We open with the Cannon logo. The yellow credits I mentioned in the Invasion U.S.A. piece have been replaced with standard white ones. I guess they only busted those out for Chuck Norris. The credits play over a jazzy sounding Dirty Harry-esque soundtrack, and the camera pulls back to reveal a very dark underground parking garage. An attractive blonde walks to her car. As is customary for this type of film, it's the only car in sight. And the one thing that amuses me is just how loud the foley team made her footsteps here. They actually drown out the music, folks. That's some pretty loud walking.

One of these is less intimidating than the other, one just doesn't belong...

2. After the credits, there's an extended bit of suspense when conveniently enough, her car won't start. As she tries to get the engine to kick over, she notices a tall figure in the shadows, wearing a stocking over his face, lit only by a light from above. She's understandably a little freaked out by this, and suddenly, a second man is standing next to the first. A third guy suddenly teleports in, and of course, after the woman looks away for a moment, they're all gone. The third guy is something of a letdown, though; generally, one would think that the scary, menacing guys would just get bigger.

3. After more of the woman desperately trying to start the car (Christ, lady, just get out and run!), the three masked guys finally actually do something. They teleport out of nowhere and attack the woman in her car and drag her out. This goes on for a bit, until the first guy is distracted by something.

"Dude, where's my car?"

4. What he sees is Paul Kersey, who's also just teleported in. This is a first, because usually Kersey shows up well after the rape is in progress. Who says old age slows you down, huh? Their opening exchange is pretty good, though predictable.

5. Kersey shoots two of the men, and I have to say, for a seasoned vigilante, he really blinks more than one would expect when firing a gun. The position of his arm changes a bit as well between shots. He shoots the third one in the leg and slowly stalks him to an exit. After Kersey blocks the exit by rolling down the gate, he finally shoots the last man.

"I can't outrun a goddamn pensioner? I should have finished college!"

Kicking the body over, Kersey looks shocked. Well, as much shock as Charles Bronson is able to convey. It's hard when your face has been frozen in the same position since the late 1950s. It turns out that Kersey is seeing his own face looking back at him.

Charles Bronson realizes all too late what his career has come to.

6. Yep, it turns out this is all a dream sequence, and the next shot is Kersey waking up in a cold sweat. Of course, like all dream sequences, the events are shown in the third person perspective, which means that not only does Paul Kersey dream of being a vigilante, he also dreams about the actual crime to boot.

7. I'm not sure why they put in that little try for psychological complexity at the end of the dream. The fourth film in a franchise isn't typically the best time to try and give your character some depth. The rest of the film evidently agrees, because none of this is referenced again.

8. Later, Paul is in his office, where he works as an architect. He's visited by Erica (Dana Barron), the daughter of his girlfriend, who we'll get to in a second. After he looks at some architectural drawings she's done, he gets a call from Karen (Kay Lenz), Erica's mother. Pretty much all you need to know about Karen is that she's a reporter and is dating Paul. If you can't guess that something bad is about to happen to this trio, you need to watch more Charles Bronson movies.

"Paul, I want you to know that I'm just as creeped out by our relationship as the audience is."

9. Later that night at home, Erica's boyfriend drives up in a yellow Camaro, and Karen tells her to be home by 10:30. Given what will happen in the next five minutes or so, let me just say right now that I'm going to give just as much attention to this young couple as the film will. And after that half a paragraph is done, I'll skip forward to where the movie takes off. Not to come off as unprofessional, but nobody goes to a Bronson film for the plot. I'm just cutting to the chase to save us all some time.

10. After Erica leaves with her boyfriend, they end up on what I'm guessing is the Santa Monica pier. Long story short, it turns out the boyfriend is mixed up with some drug dealers, and one of them sells Erica cocaine, telling her not to say anything to her boyfriend. Gosh, I wonder where this could be heading.

11. Back at home, Paul and Karen are getting ready to go to a movie. They talk about how much Paul worries about Erica, and how she's like a daughter to him, and how much he and Karen love each other, and I'm pretty sure this isn't going to end well. On the upside, Paul isn't having a creepy May-December mutant romance like he was in the third one. Eventually, they get a phone call, and sure enough, Erica has overdosed and died at the hospital.

Next on VH1's Behind the '80s: Philip Michael Thomas flames out.

12. Enraged, Erica's boyfriend heads back to the pier to confront the drug dealers. Paul follows, and gets there just in time to see a dealer kill Erica's boyfriend. Paul chases the dealer, and for some inexplicable reason the guy decides to climb a ladder up to a rooftop. Paul follows him up the ladder and then shoots him. The dealer falls onto a bumper car cage, causing sparks to shoot everywhere and general panic to ensue. And with that, Paul Kersey is back in the vigilante business.

13. Later, the police have shown up (as one would expect), led by detectives Reiner (George Dickerson) and Nozaki (Soon-Tek Oh of Missing in Action 2 and The Man with the Golden Gun). They get a description of Kersey's car... and that's about it. Well, at least Cannon films don't bog you down with exposition. You've got to give them that.

14. The next day, Paul arrives at his home and finds a large manila envelope with a note reading (in very large letters) "I know who you are." The sender of the note will be revealed in a minute, but I'm already questioning the guy's intelligence. If he knows who Kersey is, he should also know that threatening him, even obliquely, is about as smart as trying to French kiss a rotating fan.

15. Just then, the phone rings, and it turns out to be the sender of the note. He suggests a meeting, saying that if Kersey refuses, he'll go to the cops. He tells Kersey to get into a limo parked out front (and yes, we actually will find out who this limo belongs to).